…to all who have lost someone

What if I were forgotten , as if I were never there?

What if you couldn’t see me anymore , what if you didn’t care?

When my life is over , would you know my name?

Would I be remembered, would sunsets feel the same ?

What if I were forgotten , as if I were never there?

Isn’t life so transient- a breeze just passing air,

And for a while you’d miss me , see me all around,

But then you would forget me ,forget whether they were blue or brown…

What if I were forgotten , as if I were never there?

Would it even matter , should I even care?

Tonight I stand beside you and all the world stands still…

Tonight I’m yours forever , my fears are none , they’re nil.

So tonight let’s always remember, let’s not waste any time

Tonight I’m yours for always , tonight you’re always mine

And so if I were forgotten , I’ll never be not there

Because somewhere deep inside of you , some part of you will always care.

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Taking back my strength

The Jury Ad HT Mon 27

It’s play time again for me with The Jury launching this Friday and whereas the word ‘play’ is rather misleading – this is probably the time of maximum stress for me, least fun and no time! Theatre is however an absolute addiction for me… else there would be no possible reason for me to almost cause ulcers every single year!

However this year I learnt something very important- if I allow your worries and your inadequacies or stresses to become my own, then  I lost my strength. The greatest strength each one of us has is self-belief and that self belief comes easier to some than others. However when you are weaker, more tired and more stressed ; it is then the vultures can get to you- the ones that make you weaker, sadder,smaller and less believing in yourself. It’s then when the real ulcers get to grow, when sleep fades and when happiness seems but a very distant memory.

So stop!

Remember when you are tired, you will be stressed. When you are stressed, other people’s fears can take over and become yours.

Don’t.

You are strong. And once you get a good night’s sleep – you will be strong again. Work out the stress. Is it your worry or is somebody dumping their worries on you?

And when you take two minutes to just look after you… you’ll get a great sleep finally.

I did.

Good morning!

This is the week my fabulous show- The Jury  launches! Buy tickets now at Bookmyshow and come back stage and say hi!

Silent Tears

Disclaimer-: Sorry for the self absorbed , soppy post…I needed to write and needed to vent and needed to process…this is my personal diary and my outlet for me to remember what happens in my life- good or bad!

All is fine. And all else will be… I’m positive.

 

I cry when you disregard my opinions or walk past me pretending I don’t exist.

I cry when you are rude to me and you didn’t even know it…because that’s how self absorbed you are.

I cry when I’m so tired but need to go on and on and on without a complaint.

I cry when I’m being forced in to a corner with nowhere to escape.

I cry when I’m so scared , I’ve dried up inside.

I cry when I hear of rape and pain and injustice and people who died.

I cry when I hear of the submariners who died…alone in the cold of the night.

I cry when I am diagnosed with something so scary and can’t even process the fear…

I cry. I cry. I cry.

All silent tears.

And yet when you meet me…I smile… because that’s who I am.

i FEAR!

Fear.

We sell fear. We buy fear. We live in fear.

We wake up in the mornings and the newspapers scare us. Where we live is unsafe, what we’re eating is wrong, what we’re doing will destroy us…we wake up to fear.

We then go to work, fearing the repercussions of a boss who may one day fire us, a client who may one day not need us, a job where one day we’ll prove we’re replaceable by someone younger, smarter and more ambitious. We work in fear.

We come home trying got do everything the same way we have always done, faring change; lest the wife leaves us, the children hate us, the neighbour bitches about us, the friends prefer other people to spend time with. We come home in fear.

And then we exercise for fear we’ll get diabetes or a heart attack or die. We eat what the newspapers say is good for us till another study prints that all that we thought was good is now bad and we may die any way and then the fears just grow and grow and grow!

Fear starts when we’re young and our parents tell us if we don’t go to sleep ‘the Boogie man will come for us’ and then as we grow older the Boogie man becomes our jobs, our marriages, our life choices …even our food!

We fear the newspapers…we don’t celebrate the victories- big or small.

We fear our jobs- we stop enjoying them

We fear our marriages- love goes out of the window

We fear our health- an the fear causes stress and a whole new set of illnesses.

We live in fear and stress and then the fear and stress finally kills us.

I don’t know how this will work… but this week’s resolution (and I say this week…. because it’s going to be tough to retrain a system which has only been taught stress and fear)- is to HAVE NO FEAR…. I mean… think of the incredible things that I could achieve just with hard work…not worrying about a negative consequence… the possibilities are truly limitless!

Try it with me? And let’s check back on how this felt!

Fear ≠ Change

Fear-: to be afraid or to be apprehensive

When we are little we fear almost nothing. We find fire funny. We play with strays. We roll in the mud. We twist our parents ( big and fearful to others) around our little , tiny fingers and we don’t know defeat. We ask like we deserve something and we expect good things to happen to us- cos we are good, little people! And then as the years go by- we fear the ghosts under our bed, the shadows in a lane, the teacher who always shouts, the bully who hits us and fear takes over. We understand fear and we avoid confrontation because we are fearful of the result. And then later we start fearing leaving home, changing school, changing city, changing boyfriend, changing job and suddenly we equate fear with change!

There is no point fearing change because if there is any constant it is this- CHANGE IS CONSTANT and if you fear change then FEAR WILL BE CONSTANT TOO!

Every few years, whether it is my Geminian madness or my own crazy ambition- I have changed. From movies, to starting a company, to starting two companies, to teaching,to producing, to directing and now to expanding my own company.

Balancing Act Productions

Yes, Balancing Act Productions is expanding. From doing theatre and small amounts of Corporate events and workshops we will now take on more corporate work, off-sites, presentations, workshops, launches, opening, weddings, birthdays and events! I love events and I love the technical precision with which I’ve always run mine and I’d like to do more, plan to do more…WILL DO MORE!

A new team is setting up, new clients will be met…life will change and it’s terrifying !

But I’m going to equate fear with excitement and with the promise of starting something amazing… so wish me luck as I embark on yet another journey!

2013- start something new! (Check!)

P.s.-: Balancing Act Productions is expanding our Event management section and we are HIRING! Email info@balancingactproductions.com NOW!

The movie of your life! (Rules to Live By)

Rise and shine. It’s a new day. Smile. Walk. Run. Talk. Eat. Laugh. See. Do.

Don’t waste time on tears. Don’t waste time on fears. Life will happen regardless.

You may win. You will lose. You will love. You will hate. You may achieve but you must always try. Live the truth.

There will be days where you don’t want to get up. There will be days where you won’t want to sleep! There will be days that you’d love to forget and there will be those that you’ll remember every moment of.

Dream. If those dreams shatter and make some new dreams. There will be plans and they may not happen. Life has it’s own plans…It doesn’t need yours!

Save money. You will make money and you will lose money. You’ll be in debt and then you may have more than you need. Save.

Walk the road with your head held high. You may trip. You may even fall. But get up and keep walking because life is an adventure and though sometimes you are in the darkest tunnel remember there’s always a moment when you see the glorious hint of the sun!

Love. Fall in love. Rise in love. Give love. Demand love. It makes the journey of life worthwhile.

Don’t expect to love everyone and don’t expect everyone to love you.

Respect- give respect and be worthy of respect.

Inspire and be inspired! Don’t shut your mind to new experiences. Open your mind!

Eat the cupcake. Don’t spend your life on diet cause you will always see yourself as fat then! Don’t spend your life on food because you’ll miss out on other experiences then.

Have an opinion. Find one. Make one. Create one.

Laugh without a care.

Today is a great day because in the movie of your life-YOU ARE THE STAR!

One life to live (from my new Times of India Celebrity Blog!)

This Blog is courtesy my new Times of India Celebrity Blog! So do check it out!

 

 

There is usually one major reason to die but there are several reasons to live.

This week’s news was filled with suicides and self inflicted deaths. “ I watched for ten hours as he died via Skype!” screamed a headline! Harassment caused another individual to kill himself! And we haven’t even reached exam results time yet…that will be a whole different story! Some people killing themselves when they don’t get the result they expected and yet another entire set of people killing themselves in FEAR of a result!

Life is not a video game. You can’t press re-start and expect to just start over! Our may be a generation that believes in instant success, instant fame and instant money but we are also a generation that needs to understand that unlike 2 minute noodles, life doesn’t always dish out what we expected or even what’s fair!

From personal experiences, I have to say, I was 25 years old, acting in films, doing advertisements and 10 shows or even more a month; and pretty much at the top of my game when I got Acute Disseminated Encyphomyelitis ( a single attack of Multiple Sclerosis) which left me unable to speak, swallow, see and hear from one side and left side paralysed completely. This happened overnight. Life is not always fair! To try and roll over and play dead or actually will myself to die might have been an easier choice but not the right one. Choosing to die doesn’t just destroy your life, it destroys all the lives of those around you and that was something I couldn’t even think of!

When a person dies a natural death , it is terribly painful but something a family knew was inevitable. A natural death is a life passing. A suicide is a life murdered. And it leaves only destruction in its wake. a family grieving, questions unanswered and so much pain- it’s not fair.

Sure the heat is driving us angry, insane and frustrated and sure life doesn’t seem fair right now! But guess what, someone somewhere loves you- you may know them or you may not even have met them yet- but there is someone out there who will make your life worth it and as bad as your life seems now- it will only get better.

I chose life. So should you.

And so when everything’s getting you down- get up, get out and make yourself smile!

Anything from a cold glass of nimbu pani to a movie marathon with a friend! Summer’s here and with it the promise of vacations to exotic lands, sleeping in , sun, surf and beach! So this week was also about planning the perfect summer! Yup- I love my lists and plans …!

And with a weekend that started fashionably with draping of scarves and launching of luxury boats – it looks like summer’s here to put a smile on everyones’ faces and give some a much appreciated break!

So let’s raise a cold glass of cola, cheer for the IPL and plan exotic trips half way across the world!

P.s. (Palat says)-: We have one life to live so let’s LIVE IT!