The Goodbyes…

And I have realised that every good bye is tough…

When I did plays – as much as I loved opening night and all the grandeur and excitement; it was always bitter-sweet. There’d be no more rehearsals, no more swapping stories and gossip, no more long coffee breaks and bloopers. The family that we created would graduate and move on to their own lives. Of course we’d meet for shows , much like families meet for the holidays and we’d have the quick catchups and the familiar laughs but there would now be a distance and it would never quite be the same.

But then before you know it there’d be a new show and a new family and the closeness and bonds would be forged again.

When I started expanding Balancing Act, it became the same. Each person was hand picked and chosen and I made them family over time and every time one left there was a part of me that missed the relationship we shared and another part excited about the new person/ people I would meet.

I now know that life is a journey. You will meet many people on the way. People come in to your life for many reasons. Some to help you , even when you didn’t know you needed help; some to teach you lessons – even the harshest or hardest of lessons and once you receive the help or learn from the lessons they will leave you and move on as their purpose has been served.

However there will be a few who will stay on and on and on, because both you and them will keep learning, growing and helping each other. And these are the people that you will find over time, that you will learn to value and who will always have your back. These are the people who are on your journey with you- so you will never be alone.

These are the people you won’t say goodbye to.

Look for these people. Treasure these people. Love these people.

P.s. (Palat says)-: Every good bye has a hello just waiting to happen!

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Confessions of a Commitment-Phobe

Commitment-phobes come in all shapes, sizes and colours…! The nicest of people when in fear of finding something meaningful and lasting become like a caged animal and attack all that is good, caring and protective suddenly…and you , who only wanted to look after and love them are suddenly snapped at, scratched and even bitten. Hurt- you retire wounded and the commitment-phobe rests in a corner ready to attack again if asked to commit!

A self confessed commitment-phobe, it took a while for my Cancerian boy to break thru all the many boundaries I set up for him. If ever he came close to asking for a commitment , I ran the other way blindly and he quickly learnt how to wait for me to get tired and stop running so I could run straight back to him.

He listened to my silly fears. He allowed me the freedom to run away never being more than an arms distance away…so when I knew it was a bad idea I could collapse into his open arms and complain about the freedom that I had demanded!

And that’s how you deal with us….!

I am Divya and I am a commitment-phobe. I am afraid of getting hurt, afraid of sharing, afraid of caring and terrified of love. But when I do care- i give you my heart and my soul. I promise you love, loyalty and trust and a life time of adventure! I won’t be tied down… but if you give me freedom, I won’t abuse it…I just need to know you trust me enough to let me go and are smart enough to realise that if you let me fly, I’ll keep flying close to you and keep checking that you’re still around to look after me, love me and stay with me.

When the going gets tough!

So every day isn’t your best day… every day may not be a day you are proud of…it may not be a day you care to remember…it may even be a day you can’t stop the tears.

And as the rain pours and the economy sinks , days become darker and so do outlooks and in between all of this sometimes it’s hard to keep up that cheery disposition; so I have a new theory. I celebrate the wins AND NOW I CELEBRATE the losses as well! Well not celebrate… but I go out and thank God that the hurt is over, thank God that the loss has been felt and then allow myself the POWER TO GO ON and LOOK FORWARD.

Every day is not going to be amazing but our outlook can be. So what if you face rejection, humiliation and hurt- there are days where you also feel validated, loved and empowered. And like every day’s newspaper- yesterday’s news, is just yesterday’s news…! so YESTERDAY’S BLUES SHOULD REMAIN YESTERDAY’S BLUES!

Nothing in life works to a plan…that’s the joy,the journey and the fun…so strap up you are in for a hell of a ride! Why not end a scary roller-coaster or a terrible scare in the ‘haunted house’ of life with an ice cream?

..also always remember YOU ARE BLESSED…. somewhere someone is having a rougher day than you and they may not have the strength that you have. So pat yourself on the back and GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK!