We all believe we live in the moment but I have to be honest most do not! Unless you go through something life changing, you don’t even recognise how long or how powerful a moment can be. This is true. A moment really counts when my arm hurts so bad tears stream down my face or when the husband holds me apologising for the arm pain which he didn’t even cause-the MS did!
Most people just turn up in their lives. They make a guest appearance. You go to your 9-5 or 10-6 job and you just count the hours so you can leave and go back and do another mindless thing you won’t give yourself to.
You shouldn’t have to have MS or a brain tumour or nearly die or do something equally dramatic to care about your life! You can be the hero- the star of your own story- shouldn’t you use your potential to do that
With those I work with and those I’m friends with , this is what I try and enforce
- Do one thing- but do it well, else don’t even start.
- In a conversation with me , lets both look at each other and actually listen.
- A job is not 8 hrs, it can be 1 hr or 2 hrs as well- it’s just about applying yourself when you work
- Do something- one thing every day that you absolutely love and be present during that moment.
- Have one conversation every day- not on the phone but face to face. Make sure it’s honest and be absolutely involved in the conversation.
- When you are doing your job- make that the most important. When you are with your family- make that the most.
- Be true to yourself, even with new people. People will either like you or not but you can’t live your life acting like someone you are not.
- You are the star of every day. Your film stars you. Make a it a film you’d like to watch. Be proud of you.
- This won’t happen easily- there’ll be many times where you are not even present during a work day or a boring family dinner. Stop, reboot, refresh!
I write this because I see so many who just turn up in their lives and never actually show up and enjoy it. We get one chance, (even if we believe in rebirth and after life) to be the best version of ourselves- to be a part of a film called our life. Wouldn’t you want a blockbuster? I do!
P.s. (Palat says)-: Its the husband’s birthday weekend this weekend so stay tuned for soppy posts and mushy , unwritten love letters!
And now that the year is coming to a close, you start taking stock of everything that went by! Seems easier to take stock when the year has come to an end and suddenly the enormity of what you just went through hits you! Take a moment. Breathe. You made it! 2012 is over! Scraped, bruised and a bit beaten- you’ve come out punching! Some of us have come out smarter, some of us wiser, some of us harder, some of us better looking– but all of us have survived!
It’s funny when you take moment to think about all that you went thru- the first things that go thru your mind are the heart aches, the lost job opportunities , the fights, the losses, the break ups… the pain. It’s a lot harder to remember the laughter, the great conversations, the new formed friendships, the small wins , the drunken , crazy, incredible evenings, the small gestures, the kindness…. the love!
So this new year…I’m starting a ‘Memories and moments jar!’ – a jar where I will slip in a piece of paper and write the date along with any positive event that happened…! Anything- it could be the day I laughed for 10 minutes non stop, or a day where Cookie did something wonderfully cute, or the day where Aditya bought me flowers…just because! Anything funny, interesting and wonderful…so that next December 31st instead of thinking of how amazing it was that I’ve come out relatively unscathed…I will open up the jar and reminisce at a year full of wonderful moments, hilarious anecdotes and remember the love!
Have a super , super new year! 🙂 See you all on the other side!
It’s that Monday post the incredible vacation! Schools are open, work is on schedule and traffic is a b!@%h! You wish you were back in bed/on the beach/shopping! You wish you were anywhere but back because back seems even more awful now especially after than incredible break!
That’s the thing with breaks….once you taste freedom and the enormous possibilities that the world holds in store NOTHING is ever the same again!
And so how do you deal with THAT MONDAY MORNING!
- Ease in to it… now that the breakfast buffets aren’t happening and the single egg and dry toast don’t look as appetizing as the holiday ‘uber-indulgent breakfast’ did, ease in to the day slowly.
- Get a good night of sleep ending with a great book, favourite tv show, or warm tea! Make sure you are SMILING on Sunday night…it’ll make monday a heck of a lot easier!
- Lie in bed just a bit longer on Monday, it’ll help with the ‘work-lag!’
- Dress up! You look good, you feel good!
- Load your favourite songs on your iPod! That way despite the awful, crawling traffic and the annoying RJ who talks too much; you have some great music that can make the morning infinitely more in tune!
- Take the 11 am break! Grab a cuppa, a quick chocolate, a walk outside, a facebook sneak peak! Take the BREAK!
- Remember you don’t have to finish everything TODAY! If the one thing the vacation taught you , it was how important it is to make time for yourself and your family….so before all the amazing life lessons we learn while on break run dry- REMEMBER IT and CELEBRATE IT!
- Call the people you have to, have to call today! The rest…well, you have a whole week left!
- Take an hour for lunch- the full hour! Even if you have no lunch and far too much work- Monday’s are overwhelming as it is and the Monday after a break is super tough! Acknowledge that and breathe! It’ll make you more productive!
- Get a 3 p.m. break and catch up on birthdays and gossip, coffee and conversations! You’ve almost made it thru the toughest day post vacation!
- Get off work on time! You won’t finish everything today. You don’t have to. You have a whole week left and you got thru a whole day! YAY!
- Get home. Have a warm dinner, catch up with friends, relax and pamper yourself! EASE INTO WORK AND THE WEEK ELSE you’ll just feel angry , frustrated and cheated! an expensive break and the joy you felt with it would have been washed away by a couple of hours back at the office and you definitely don’t want that!
Don’t be guilted by people for taking your break. You work hard. You deserve it! Enjoy the new tan and the glowing skin and remember the trick to the happiness we feel on vacation is that on vacation we make ourselves a priority! Make yourself a priority EVEN ON THAT MONDAY MORNING!!!!;)
So there comes in time in every relationship when you make ‘the list.’ The list is all the guys/ girls you’ve dated and then what you actually want on the other side! And what’s really funny (and I think a personal joke for Fate!) is that who you end up with may have just a few or none of the things on your very dramatic first list! 😉 So to make a more realistic list here’s what I think should be on it!
Forget about the looks …looks come, looks go…! Looks fade and now looks can be completely altered….! So that’s just transient! Now I’m writing about a guy…but the same list applies for men…just change the gender !
- Does he challenge you? Not to a duel or fighting match…but can he match wits with you… Can he talk first? Can he bring up interesting things to do? Does he argue with you and challenge you to think, to feel ,to accomplish?
- Does he make you smile? He doesn’t need to be a comedian or juggler….but can he make you smile…even when he’s not around. Take a moment to think of him….now- did you smile?
- Does he encourage you to take chances…even when you’re afraid cos you know he’;ll be there like a landing mat if you came crashing down ! Playing safe is okay in life but sometimes a little bit of crazy can really bond two people together…so does he make you feel you can accomplish your crazy dreams!?
- Does he fight for you?!? Not a physical fight or even a verbal fight but if push came to shove which side of the line would he be on? Would he be by your side or move away cos he doesn’t like a scene? You want the one who’ll be with you when your down to make sure you can be down but never out!
- Does he share some of your interests ? That’s a great talking point and a great bonding point!
- Can he do NOTHING with you? Just a day vegging out or sleeping or watching TV or not talking…can he be there by your side and most importantly does it still feel comfortable?
- Can you be comfortable with him- leave you hair loose, put on shorts, watch idol and cry and can he be comfortable with you- swear at the tv, watch a match with the same intensity as if he were playing it, fight with you knowing that you won’t leave…. Can you be honest?
- Can you create a gibberish language and still understand each other…or look at him and know what he’s thinking…do you take the time to connect? Do you want to?
- Do you respect him? Relationships are formed with respect. Make sure you respect yourself but make sure you respect him too… Without respect there’s no real relationship.
- When you hold hands does it all seem to make sense…
If some of this makes sense to you…add it in your list….I think you’ll find that this list is way cooler than a list which just has his earning potential, his looks, his cars, her measurements, her legs, her eyes… 😉 you get the drift!
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