Virtual Reality vs. You

Today’s world is a PR world… a world built on perception and fantasy based in our own ‘virtual reality.’

Virtual reality is the new real world experience. And what you are perceived to be is what you are… Or is it?

When we tweet “Love is what I am all about…” do we forget that we’re in an extramarital relationship or that our husband doesn’t come home to us?

Why else would we post ” With Super star ________”… when we’re backstage at an event ensuring he gets water at the right temperature or a seat at the right time!

When we photograph food or alcohol on a friday night saying “Yay Friday…” are we trying to pretend that the food and alcohol will be eaten and drunk by someone other than us despite knowing this will be yet another lonely weekend?

And all this is fine… if you know the truth. My only grouse is with those whose virtual reality has so far eclipsed their actual reality that they pretend to be the holier than thou souls ; those that can do no wrong. So full of themselves, they forget that behind the cover of the web their actual being is nothing like the one that they perceive themselves to be! Their perception is their reality and that reality is skewed. When they actually meet real people , we’re in for a shock because since we don’t see them with rose-tinted glasses…they like any one of us is flawed… but maybe even slightly more damaged. How so, you ask? Well at least we know who we really are… but them behind their PR and delusional virtual reality have forgotten who they were so long ago that they don’t ever see themselves without the tinted glasses.

So even when the world’s laughing in front of them, at them… they miss out on the joke… because they’re so busy creating a new virtue reality starring themselves!



alone: being without anyone else, solitary

It’s hard to feel alone in a world where we’re so connected. Gone are the days where you waited for a letter from someone you loved, or worried when someone you cared about came home late. A quick email with more emoticons than words can connect people across the globe in milliseconds and a mobile phone call ensures we always know where the people we care about are.

And yet we’re alone.

The 4 page letter on perfumed stationary has become a 2 line email and those long weekend phone conversations with family across the world has now become more of a chore than a delight , with phone conversations often lasting no more than a minute- after all they’re ‘just a phone call away.’

And so despite the connections,we never actually connect. It’s like each of us have these long powerful networks of wires but to actually connect with someone else’s wires might cause an electricity spark and shut us down. We’re so scared about connecting, so scared to feel and if in case we are one of those ‘sensitive ones’ who actually have feelings, then we’re petrified about sharing them.

And why is that? Because in this new, technologically advanced world of ours, appearance is everything and each of us live every day realising the power of marketing that appearance. Boys are taught not to cry. Girls mustn’t cry either, especially if they want to make it in the Corporate world. And so each of us market the best possible side of ourselves to all that we meet and never ever actually connect and never ever ever share!

They used to say that a race horse with a broken leg had to be shot and in truth most of us are like wounded race horses still running , smiling, walking and even jumping despite some incredible pain.

To hold the pain inside is not brave. To share it is.

The last weeks suicides shocked several and made me sad. But this is something that’s been happening for years, just the prevalence is now at an all time high. As per police stats in Mumbai the number of lives lost every day to suicide is THREE! Those are 3 people who were scared to be judged by you, 3 people scared of not being ‘perfect’ and 3 people who just couldn’t smile anymore.

So maybe the next time you see a smile that doesn’t quite reach the eyes, ask what’s wrong and maybe the next time you feel like crying , you reach out to someone (friend, family, counselor) and just have a good, good cry.

I know it’s difficult but often what’s on the surface is very different to what’s inside and though we may quote ‘never judge a book by it’s cover,’ we never actually practice it! So before you tear someone down based on appearance or just based on ‘how they seem,’ take a moment. Just like I’m sure deep inside you’d like to be loved and respected for who you actually are and how you really feel- maybe they deserve the same as well!

Take the time today and try and actually connecting. Start getting to know someone and let someone new start getting to know you.

You may not be so alone then.


To a Happy Vishu and to new beginnings!


So the night ended late with Vishukkani (the first things you must see on Vishu morning) being set up by me. Vishukkani literally translated is the first things you must see on Vishu morning) These are a collection of auspicious things and special things you want the year to be full of! So it is an exciting, wonderful and fabulous collection of flowers, work materials, new clothes, rice,fruit, vegetables, gold,silver and special mementos with lots of meaning. I set this up late in the night and the next morning before sunrise wake up and hope to open my eyes and see God and all these wonderful offerings as an auspicious start to my new year! I light the lamps and say my prayers and pray that the year to come will bring all my dreams to fruition!

After this I wake Aditya up and keep his eyes covered or shut and take him into the Puja (Prayer) room and have him open his eyes in front of God and he now says his prayers touching each object and then touching his head asking God to bless the object and him.

Then the 2 of us wake our sleeping puppy Cookie and she sits with us and marvels at the decorations and the flowers and while she prays (for us, because she’s just that kind of girl0; we pray for her and thank God she came in to our lives!

To new beginnings and scaling greater heights- HAPPY VISHU ALL!

Puppy prayers