Life’s not fair- a complaint that plagues even the most optimistic of us. And you’re right. It’s the friend who you thought would pick up the phone when you needed them or the pitch that was stolen by the lazy incompetent colleague who pretended the idea was his or just being surrounded by sloth, carelessness and general apathy when you give all that you have for a person , an idea or a moment.
I have realised that you can’t control others and their attitude. All you can control is how you choose to deal with them. I have often been heartbroken when I care about someone- (friend or colleague) deeply and they let me down by not caring the same amount or believing in us the way I do. And now over the years I slowly am getting over it.
I have always been the one giving 100% to relationships – work or personal that I care about. But that too is my choice. Much like waves, some of the water stays and some it goes back- people often come in to our life for a reason. When the reason is fulfilled , most will go away. Those that you are left with are those that have more to give you and more to learn from you and those that leave have served their purpose and you theirs.
You can’t stop caring, turning up or giving your cent percent to life because every so often you will get the opportunity you’ve been dreaming of, meet the person you were destined to meet and live the life you absolutely deserve. The bumps on the way only make you realise how good the goods are and appreciate those moments so much more.
My grandfather always said life was full of ups and downs – how boring life would be if it were one straight line. Compare that to a heart monitor and you realise that he’s right… the ups and downs make the journey. Without that, using the same example, we’re quite literally dead !
P.s. (Palat says)-: Pitching season is the longest, toughest, hardest and most exhilarating season! On one hand Mondays are the best and most exciting – on the other TGIF!
I am a bundle of contradictions. I am stubborn, bull headed , hard nosed and appear very all-together but I cry during every episode of X factor and most episodes of Grey’s Anatomy. I hate mornings,love evenings. I hate the cold but love the snow! I love the beach and sea but have to have a shower before getting in and minutes after getting out! I’m a neat freak and obsessive compulsive over so many things!I love the madness and excitement of vacations but have to plan every hour of my vacation in my head and then make colour coded lists and file it just for me to have fun. I love fun but like for it to be scheduled fun! I’m angry, soft-hearted, a worry-wart and at the same time impetuous!
Would you still love me if you knew me?
All of us have so many amazing qualities and at the same time so many qualities that are just downright annoying. When you are in a relationship or have found a partner who will tolerate the good with the bad- hold on to them! As amazing as you think you are ,have several qualities that maybe just a little less amazing ! If they can look past your bad and highlight your good- they are a keeper!
I often find friends who say “He/she is amazing…but…” There will always be a but…BUT guess what in your list of attributes there’s a ‘but’ there as well! And if they can look past that surely you can see past their seemingly annoying qualities!
Some qualities are non-negotiables though. If their bad quality is an addiction (alcohol, drugs etc)- leave them. Help them get help and leave them! Let them be helped by professionals and then re-look at the relationship only when you have also understood how much work will go in to having a relationship with an addict. If they abuse you (physically or verbally) – LEAVE! They need help and you don’t need to be a punching bag so leave…When they say ’till death do us part…’ they don’t mean for your partner to actually kill you.
Don’t look for your romantic movie hero/ heroine cause he might be right in front of you. He / she may not come up on a horse or have violins playing in the background every time you see them but remember movies end and reality starts and if you see the person you’re with as the romantic lead in your life, your movie will always have a happily ever after!
So beyond the non-negotiables…if your partner is not neat, is a mountain person, snores a bit or leaves empty dishes in the fridge…remember you’re not perfect either…so cut him some slack and take a second to enjoy the fact that you are loved – by another person and he/ she loves you just the way you are, because of the way you are!