“Help me!” – two words that have got such a bad reputation in the English language! “Help me!”- shows weakness.”Help me!”- shows inability. “Help me!”- is pathetic, laughable, unmanly,namby-pamby and just downright sad!
Instead of asking for help , it seems to make more sense to commit suicide, kill others, kill ourselves, commit divorce, burn children,abuse and hurt pets-those are the more acceptable solutions!
And I am angry. Not a shocker for those who know me….But now I’m really mad.
I do not want you to find a counselor or a support group or a really good friend- I want you to get help and be UNAFRAID TO ASK FOR IT!
In India we have always perceived those who’d seek a counselor’s help a little bit nuts… I mean you have to be a little mad to seek help that your friends and family can’t give you. I mean our parents never needed counseling- why the hell should we?!
But today is a different generation. We are a generation who don’t finish work at 6 p.m., who have to reply an email at 11:30 p.m. at night because that’s what ‘Smartphones ‘ are for, who have heart attacks in our 30’s because we’re a generation of plenty- plenty of food, technology AND stress! We are a generation who create smart Status Updates despite being laid off work or stuck with typhoid! We are a generation who misuse the words- “I’m fine”- because we don’t need pity, help, sad eyes! We are a generation who are anything but fine!
Our parents went home to family. They stopped work. They shared stresses. They had friends- some real friends that didn’t judge based on appearances. They had stresses. But they had people around to help.
I am angry some days. I am scared, tired, alone, afraid,outraged, shocked, violent. Some days I want to break a plate or 25 plates, or hit a wall or curl up and hide. And this is okay. Because I am human and it’s normal to feel a range of emotions – sometimes all at once and sometimes all in one day.
But let’s make it acceptable to ask for help. Talk to someone- friend, confidant, counselor- work out the stresses, the stressers, the anger, the pain. And let’s start healing before we keep exploding.
And as a friend to someone today when you ask them how they are- really mean it and… DON’T ACCEPT THE ANSWER -“I’m fine!”
Divya's Blog! 
Interesting and unusual
LikeLike
Thank you!
LikeLike
Yes, very true! We are always taught to be the winners, or better say, if not winner, than to be a good pretender. We live in and boast off a society that does not care much about the mental health of a person. We worship the cricket icons, but we don’t look at the fact the Indian cricket team has its own psychologist for 24×7 support. Hence the average people out here are afraid of being a loser. We don’t know how to accept failure in our lives. Such social norms and structures sometimes makes me claustrophobic.
LikeLike
Agreed Durba. We’ve been taught that winning is the only option…we’ve forgotten that it’s only in losing that we understand the true worth of a win. It’s only in failure , that we respect the work that goes behind a success.
We have to learn to accept the highs and lows of our lives else the claustrophobia will keep increasing and eventually we will feel like the walls are closing in!
LikeLike
I guess this is what it means to be human, we are not infallible.
LikeLike
thank you for being my person!
you help me…even when i don’t know i need help.
LikeLike